I love to use Pavlovian conditioning on myself.
Over the years I've learned to deal with certain situations through associations. One may call it Pavlov's conditioning.
Feeling stressed and depressed? Buying your comfort food/drink will make you feel better.
Feeling motivated? Drinking your motivation juice will give you lots of energy.
These are some of the main things that I apply constantly throughout the my daily life. I literally even associated a specific drink with productivity, something my tongue tastes and body recognizes as "work drink." Once I consume it, my body prepares itself to work.
I find it effective and reliable especially during times of stress.
But there's one problem.
Today I'm feeling super motivated, but I'm missing the energy. Despite having motivation to work, my body doesn't register it on its own; instead it needs the drink as confirmation to proceed.
Ordering drinks from boba shops is the most effective but also the most expensive. Having a threshold of $15 worth of order means I pay _atleast_ $25 a day including tips and all the damn shitty Doordash fees. $25 bucks a day for two drinks is about $75 a week (excluding Sundays). That's $300 a month! Almost the same amount as what I'm paying for my monthly student loans!
That's insane.
In order to combat this, I splurge in groceries and buy lots of drinks as it tends to be a bit cheaper ($5 for a bottle that can last for a week). I alternate between my go-to milktea and my favorite lychee juice (so I don't get sick of it easily), and to make it more sustainable I've been trying homemade drinks. I bought some french vanilla and while it's good and lasts awhile, it gives me bad crashes late at night which is a very bad outcome if I still have motivation left and stuff to finish. I don't normally drink tea on its own, and I'm not a big fan of normal coffee. I'm not fond of powdered fruit juices and most powdered bubble tea sucks. I'm thinking of trying mocha next, but as you can see I'm basically running out of options.
Today I'm struggling because I have so much motivation to work, but I have no energy. I can't order nor go outside to get groceries because it's cold and I'm broke. I haven't put myself out there yet, and desperation might lead me to doing old gigs I don't even wanna do anymore but I'm trying my best to hold on for now. I want to slowly move away from the e-girl lifestyle and actually earn money from my content; for people to support me because I made them smile or gave them comfort, instead of getting donations for being a mediocrely attractive girl. It feels more fulfilling that way.
(But then again, I can't do the work without the drink which i cannot get without being an e-girl. Oh the irony...)